I GIVE UP ON YOU!!!
I turned 20 a couple days ago and that got me thinking about my future goals and plans, you know the ideal "model-me" I want to be in a couple of years. I have been having goals ever since I hit puberty and yes some of them I have achieved and I am very proud of myself for doing that. But there are other goals i make every single year, every week and sometimes every day that I NEVER ACHIEVE... EVER! Thoughts of these "things" resulted in me making this list of goals/ambitions/ideals i may as well (and in fact will!!!) just give up on.
- Being more lady-like
Yes we all know her, the perfect lady with her perfect manners, neat appearance and girly dresses. perfectly combed hair who giggles and all the boys slobber. I have always envied her, (sometimes kind of hated her too) and I've tried! and tried! and tried some more to be like Miss. Ladylike! but *sigh* no avail! I mean c'mon! I'm a last born with two older brothers, tomboyism has been drilled soo deeply into me that its probably a part of my DNA. so I've have decided that i will not suffer the pain of pretense! I will embrace my natural roughness and lack of feminine etiquette. I will get used to the fact that i look better in jeans and t-shirts than i do in frills and bows, which is totally OK!!! (just don't tell my mother about this, it will break her heart, she's been trying to make me a lady for years 20 now!!!).
2. FINDING PRINCE CHARMING
|The hardest thing I have ever had to do is letting go of you my love!!!|
I like guys who are good-looking, not too dark, not too light. he must dress well but still have a certain ruggedness to him. he should mumble when he talks and everybody knows that he is a bad boy to the core, but when he's with me he is a kitten in my hands. We should have fights that look like scenes from hell but when its all over and I'm heartbroken crying my heart out, he will come back to me crawling and on bent knees, his eyes glistening as he begs me for my forgiveness. Lets just say i like guys that basically do not exist. yes! i admit i am totally in love with the cliche Prince Charming. Unfourtunatly it may have taken me 2 decades to realise that there is no such thing/person as prince charming *sniffles* so its time i threw him out the window together with being lady-like and be content with the guy that sits next me in Chemistry class. He's not Prince Charming but i suppose he will work just fine!
3. LOOKING LIKE A MODEL
Don't snicker like you have never had this dream before! its this whole magazine and media culture! they make you think that everyone in the world has a score of 10 and when u look at yourself in the mirror you feel like your weighing the world down with your unbecoming looks ( which i wont even give a score to!) I'm not even going to lie, there are many times when i get frustrated because i don't look "perfect". What helps a lot though is thinking differently, I mean if i don't walk the streets expecting people to look perfect, then people probably don't expect the same from me. looking presentable will get you by just perfectly. So i am saying goodbye to looking perfect (even when i tried it still wouldn't work). Btw, people in magazines have whole crews plus Photoshop to make them look that awesome so i am going to just let it go!
4. BEING A HARD WORKER
|ummm... no we can't!!!???|
Yes i know this is something i should not proudly give up on and i'm not proud of it either but lets face it, I am a lazy human being. and i can get things done perfectly well without cracking my head in the process. plus hard work makes me cranky and moody. So i give up on hard work, unless i get poor, being poor terrifies me!!! i'll probably work extremely hard then and only then!
5. BEING FRIENDS WITH EVERYONE
I honestly say that i think i am a nice and good person. I never intentionally create beef with anyone and whenever i fight i feel awful seconds later. The world unfortunately is full of haters. it doesn't matter how nice you are to some people, as soon as you turn around they are going to hate on you and on anything u have your weave, your walk, your dress, your talk! BLAH! i can not keep up with haters and i'm over the childhood nonsense of making your friends, your enemies. I am content and totally happy with the hommies I have now, so all haters, enemies and non-friends, its official! i give up on you!
Yeah so that's my list of things I have given up on and wont stress myself about anymore. They are all perfectly good ideals that i truly do admire but hey! its not for me! from now on i prefer to focus on the more attainable like not sleeping in public , being more daring, being on time... yeah that kind of thing!!! they are soooo totally achievable!!!!
p.s. sorry for the lame layout, I'm still trying to get a hang off this whole blogger thing!!! have a nice week ya'll!!!